Ten Feet Taller in Charisma and Strength

My dearest Poppyseed. There is a likely chance that today will be the last time I write to you as simply my Poppyseed. Tomorrow, hopefully, I will be writing to you as my Lucy or my Liam. As excited as I am for this big reveal, a small piece of me cannot help but to feel a bit nostalgic. I know. Your erratic, emotional mother at it again with her silly feelings. However, silly or not, this is undoubtedly a momentous occasion in my eyes, moving from one stage of my pregnancy to another, never again thinking of you as just my child but instead, as my son or daughter. In honor of this...graduation, allow me to share one more story for my Poppyseed. 

Your Auntie Lou Lou is my very best friend. In fact, she has gone to a lot of trouble to make this time very special for your daddy and me. This is the tale of how I met my best friend. 

When I was in high school, theatre arts was the most important thing in my life, maybe second to your dad. I loved to act. I loved being in the spotlight. The stage beckoned to me, and I answered its call. However, not only did I answer and fulfill my passion, I was quite good at it, too. Some may say I was the best. And at Ferris High School, maybe I was. Whether or not I was actually the best, I certainly believed I was. I believed I was unbeatable! The next star. The top. One thing I didn't realize at the time: it's a long fall from the top. 

Participating in UIL One Act Play, a theatre competition amongst schools in the area, was my focus from 8th grade until my senior year. One Act Play was at the forefront of my mind in the spring of 2003 as I played the role of Lady Bracknell in Oscar Wilde's The Importance of Being Earnest, my final role as a high school student.

The district competition soon came around and the cast of Earnest did not leave disappointed. In fact, as great as I thought I was, I had never before received One Act Play's highest honor for a female actor, Best Actress, given to ONE girl from all competing schools. Up to this point, I had always received the next best thing, All Star Cast Member. District competition changed that. Not only did my cast leave that night with a sure spot in the Area competition, but several cast members received All Star Cast, my good friend and cousin Trevor left with Best Actor, and your Mama left with her head held high and the most beautiful trophy in her hand, reading Best Actress District 3A. It was a night I will never forget. 

Being that we lived in a small town, we were highly esteemed high school heros when we came home. Well, that's how I remember it, anyway. Our picture was in the paper along with an article revering our talent. There was a separate picture of just Trevor and me, the  highest awarded players in the competition. We were even invited to a school board meeting, where we all received certificates for outstanding performance. We had done well, and we were ready to continue our journey to the top. Next stop, Area competition, Athens, Texas. 

My parents and cousin Christi decided to accompany me to the competition in Athens.  No one in my family was there to see my previous achievement, so they wanted to be sure to not miss it again. After watching a show or two, evaluating the competition, our cast headed to our room to get ready for show time. My family stayed in the theatre, promising to keep an eye out for any real threats to our advance to Regionals. Soon, it was our turn to perform. 

The audience was wonderful. They loved me! I had never had quite the laughs I had that night. When we were through, people complimented me, undeniably impressed with a 17 year old girl's ability to transform into an elderly, British, aristocrat of the late 19th century. I was confident that we had done it again. 

When it was nearly time for awards to be announced, I sat waiting with my cast and my family. Before the ceremony began, I asked my parents for their opinions of the shows. They, of course, were highly impressed with me, as they are a bit biased. However, they quickly began to tell me of a girl from Canton's play. They couldn't remember her name, but she was "so good." "She did a wonderful job of playing drunk, and she had a moving moment at the conclusion where her character took her own life," my mother gushed. "She was pretty good," my father added. I will admit, I was surprised. My parents never seemed to notice anyone's talent other than my own, and if they did happen to notice, they certainly didn't go on and on about it. But this girl, they LOVED her. Oh they assured me that she wasn't better than me, but they couldn't bring themselves to tell the lie that I was better than her. My confidence was shaken, but not shattered. If this girl was anything as my parents made her out to be, then surely we could have our rematch at Regionals. Then, I could decide for myself if she was anything to be in awe of. 

The MC came to the stage. The lights dimmed. The crowd became silent. It was the moment of truth. The Honorable Mention  awards were announced first. Although, I really wasn't concerned with landing this lowest of awards, I was relived as always when they had finished calling names and I was not one of the recipients. Next, was All Star Cast. I would take it. Of course. I could prove next time around that Best Actress was truly the award I deserved. I would work harder to make sure this Canton girl would be long forgotten after people saw my performance. Several people from my cast were receiving All Star Cast awards. This comforted me as none of them had ever achieved honors quite as high as I had. The All Star Cast Awards had been handed out. I cheered on several of our cast, including Trevor. "Poor guy," I thought, "won't be Best Actor this time." However, my confidence was back! There was only one award left, and it belonged to me! Just to reassure myself I turned around to whisper to my mom, "Did that girl win an award yet?"

The look on mother's face was unforgettable. She had a look of being in pain while on the verge of tears. She had covered her mouth with her hand, and as she looked at me with a most apologetic stare, she slowly shook her head from side to side. She knew. 

The next words I heard were distant, almost as if I was hearing them from underwater, my fear and shame drowning out all other sounds. "Best actress goes to..." They said a name that didn't register with me, but I heard the last part. "Canton high school." 

I was devastated. Not only had I worked for this my whole life. Not only had I not gotten best actress. Not only did my cast not advance to Regionals giving me no opportunity to redeem myself. On top of all of these heartbreaking facts, I had not won ANY award, something that had NEVER happened in a lifetime of performing. Not even Honorable Mention. And this was my very last competition before graduating high school. It was over. And I...had lost. 


Come to find out, the amazing actress from
Canton also won Best Actress at state. That helped to heal my wounded pride. At least I was beaten by, literally, the best. The remainder of the school year hurried by. My heart mended some, but my ego had taken a much bigger hit. When it came time to choose a college, I chose Tyler Junior College. I had gotten a small theatre scholarship from there and would be going with one of my best friends Courtney Blount. Come August, I would be heading to the beauty of East Texas. Who would have thought, with one small choice, I would meet my clone? 

About a month before school started, I attended a freshman orientation to acquaint me with the campus and other students. During a tour of the campus, I had migrated to the back of the group. I was scared and nervous. The back was most comforting. At one point during the tour, we reached Wise Auditorium, a beautiful, brick building with large white columns - very collegiate looking. "Who in the group will be a theatre major?" asked the guide. Reluctantly, I looked around and, seeing two other hands go up, I raised mine. The guide continued, explaining that this would be the building where our annual musical would be held. As we moved on to our next destination, the other girl who had raised her hand began to walk closer towards me. She seemed nervous too, but she had an air of confidence about her. I can't remember who spoke first, but we introduced ourselves. Her name was Lauren. She was very tall and pretty. Again, I kept thinking about how confident she seemed. But it was a confidence that was delicately mixed with grace and kindness. Never did she give off the feeling of being cocky or stuck up. 

"You're a theatre major?" she asked. 
"Yeah. You too? I replied. 
"Yeah. Did you do theatre in high school?"
"I did. One Act Play and everything. You?"
With nonchalance, she let me know that she too had done some competing in high school. 

As the conversation continued, we talked about our experiences with high school theatre. Eventually the subject of "How well did your school do?" came up. 
"We advanced to state," she said. 
"Wow. Did you receive any individual awards."
She almost seemed embarrassed to answer. So modest. 
"I got best actress a few times."
At that moment, it hit me. She could be any girl from any school in the state. In fact, the chances that she would be a girl even from my area were slim. But somehow, I knew. 
"Did you get Best Actress at state?"
"Yes," she answered. 
"Are you from Canton?"
And in her deep East Texas accent, she answered, "Yeah. How'd you know?"

I had spent the last three months of my life hating this girl. This sweet girl who wanted nothing but to have a friend to talk to during the campus tour. In the months to follow,  Lauren and I became the closest of friends. In fact, I had not realized one could find a soul mate in a friend, but it was as though our paths were destined to cross, changing our lives forever. 

Before I met Lauren, I may have thought that the highlight of this story would undoubtably be my triumph at District. Sitting in my chair as the MC called out the awards one by one. Handing the things in my lap over to a good friend, Joe Hamm, as I readied myself to walk to the stage to receive my praise. Crying with delight as Trevor placed a proud arm around me, trophies gleaming in our hands. Hearing my mother shout with pure pride as I told her the happy news over the phone. I felt so strongly about my win and my loss during my senior year that I was sure nothing could trump it. How wrong I was. 

There are many lessons you could learn from this piece of my life, Poppyseed. Don't be blinded by pride. There will always be someone better than you at what you do. Be humble. Don't let others stroke your ego to the point of you losing sight of reality. Have confidence in yourself mixed with the right amount of humility. Know that what you may see as defeat, could be God's way of opening new doors for you. Sometimes, you will even be able to look back on times when you felt you were at your lowest with a smile, knowing how bright it was about to get. Most of all, I hope you take from this story the beauty of friendship. It comes in many shapes, sizes, and colors. It may even come masked as who you thought was your worst enemy. It may come unexpectedly. It may come at a time when you feel you don't need it or when you need it the most. But, come it will. Embrace it! You will know a genuine heart when you meet one. Befriend that heart. The reward may not be a nice shinny trophy to put on a shelf. You may end up with something even better.  You may end up with a friend. 

"Who would have thought? Who would have known? With one small choice, I met my clone. Maybe a foot shorter, but only in length. Ten feet taller in charisma and strength." Lauren Wycough